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Showing posts with label coping. Show all posts
Showing posts with label coping. Show all posts

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Observing the Coffee Shop People... And a Little Love and Passion - Entry 8

Image courtesy of Jeroen van Oostrom/FreeDigitalPhotos.net       
This started as a writing exercise as I sat at the coffee shop observing people for character development.

Reading over it one day I  decided to write a short story based on the characters.  I kept it in the form of a journal.


June 12th…
Ok something has to give sooner or later.  Stories keep being rejected, but remember Stephen King’s spike holding all his rejection slips.  Hold on and don’t give up, my time has not yet come.  Maybe I need that partner who will find my breakthrough story I tossed in the trash and he tells me how it will be my story to lead me to success.  Yeah sure, I should be so lucky.  What do I want, luck in publishing or luck in love? Maybe both, is that too much to ask for?

Get that coffee. A good jolt to the system is always the cure to what ails you.  Oh my, the coffee counter girl has green and white streaks in here hair, must be a real company girl.  Don’t have to worry about here thinking I’m strange for the way I take my coffee or bagel. 

Did I ever tell anyone that I feel energy from people?  Well I do very strongly. That is why I have such a hard time going to conventions and seminars.  Conventions especially where people are from all over the country or other parts of the world.  People who are looking for a quick sexual encounter just because they are there and can get away with it. And after all what are conventions for, at least for some of the population. That activity emits a lot of energy, energy that I pick up very strongly and can be very difficult for me to handle. So I stay away from all the writers’ conventions, just to keep myself calm. Is that why I can’t get published? 

Someone here has some strong energy I am detecting it right now.   Don’t think they are here for a tryst, but they have something going on.  Who is it? My, oh my, this man coming up to the counter for his coffee.  Wow, tall, very broad shoulders tapering down to a pretty nifty butt I must say. Think some twenty something jocks could be jealous of that, or maybe give them hope they can look that way at this age.  He must be around sixty, and well preserved, more hope for getting older.  He does smell good, haven’t been close to a good scented man for a long, long time.  Oh my God he has blue eyes. I feel faint like a teenager next to the football hero. I think I am getting a hot flash.  No wait I took my hormones today, must be a flash of lust.  Like he is going to even notice me, silver haired with my skin thinning and loosing its elasticity, but look he has graying hair and I must ad a little skin showing on the top of his head.  I never would have thought bald would end up looking sexy and appealing. Getting older sure does change your view of things. Remember Grandpa, remember Chemistry book man, they were not looking at the ‘young chicks’. He drinks his coffee the same way I do dark roast with a shot of espresso, our first thing in common.  How romantic!   Oh, he is using his wife’s coffee club card; oh no he asked if he could change it to his she has passed.  Poor man, I know how that feels, should I give him my condolences?  Oh come on, snap out of it.
Get control of yourself silly old girl.  Take your coffee not his. Oh how embarrassing. I hope he didn’t notice.  Go to your table.  Write.  Drink coffee.  Daydream about Football Hero...

© Copyright 2014   Eileen A Partak

 


Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Observing the Coffee Shop People... And a Little Love and Passion - Entry 6

 Image courtesy of Jeroen van Oostrom/FreeDigitalPhotos.net       
This story started as I sat at the coffee shop on writing days observing people for character development.

Reading over it one day I  decided to write a short story based on the characters.  I kept it in the form of a journal.


 April 22….
Focus!  You must stay focused.  Everyone tells me that. Why can’t I?  The coffee shop is slow today.  Many students.  Do they understand how precious their youth is?  There are many men here alone.  Why so many men out in the day alone?  Sometimes I think men read more than women do.  That’s what it is today, older men – busy reading.  You look at them they seem like Grandpas, still men but older men.  Do they still have the desires of the young men?  Grandpa is there looking through his sports magazine.  He doesn’t take his vest off, baseball type cap, why do they always wear those caps?

No one fears the older man, he is just the grandpa and that is no threat.  Now everyone looks at the table with the younger men and the girl.  They must be the ones with nothing but sex on their minds. Yes driven by hormones only.   You can see that by the silly grin on his face.  Sure after they leave here they are off for a romp. It is expected, yes youth.  Sex is so wasted on them.   Look at Grandpa, he doesn’t have the grin, he isn’t salivating over Miss Cheerleader with the short skirt yelling ‘Look at me.’  Maturity – yes maturity understands sex, desire, what it is really about.   It is not just hormone driven. The experience of life understands the importance, knows it isn’t just the moment of climax, knows how to find the deep feelings knowing that romance must accompany sex, understanding must accompany sex, caring must be there to make it complete.  Knowing the total person, everything about them must accompany sex. Sex for the sake of sex is nothing.  Sex, deep passion, comes with understanding it is just not for your own pleasure, pleasing your partner is the most important, then that alone will please you totally, sexually, spiritually, in every way.  Mind and body are really connected into one; one cannot be totally happy and pleased without the other feeling the same. 

Grandpa doesn’t look at Miss Cheerleader. He looks over at the mature women, the one who carries herself with grace, dignity, beauty, knowing what her life is, knowing what is important and what pleases her.   The two of them, yes, real passion would develop, real caring, real love.  The youth, silly as they are, they think lust belongs to them.  Lust, passion and love belong to the experienced, yes the mature know.  Society has it wrong; the youth will destroy it, give love and sex back to those who know what it really is. 


Maybe being alone for so many years has frustrated me.  Spent all that time raising the kids, working, taking no time for me.  Now where is life?  Retirement is advertised as the time to do things, what things?  Daughter’s divorce will be final soon, son now on his second wife, but I think he has a good sex life with this one.  A good sex life is important for the young. For the young at heart too?  Again, focus on the writing. I can still be a writer at this age.  I must have sex on my mind today.  Am I a frustrated writer, or a frustrated lover?   Need more coffee, now!    Make note: I need sex...

© Copyright 2014   Eileen A Partak

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Holding Memories

Image courtesy of mistermong /FreeDigitalPhotos.net
“If it’s any consolation for you, she died instantly.”  The words of the police officer played over in Rex Bernard’s head.  It was their tenth anniversary. They had plans to meet for dinner to celebrate.  It was bad enough the accident occurred on their anniversary but they had a ridiculous argument that morning over where to dine. He insisted she drive and meet him at the restaurant near his office.  Her argument was she didn’t like driving in unfamiliar areas, but she finally agreed.  Jill got lost.   She impetuously drove along the foreign streets trying to find the restaurant and missed the stop sign. A truck hit the side of her car.  She died instantly.

It was his first day back to the office since Jill’s death the month before. All the sympathetic stares and well-meaning words had exhausted him.  He couldn’t wait to return home to rest.  But he was reluctant to enter the empty house. It felt so cold and lonely since Jill was gone. A light rain dotted the sidewalk as he made his way to the door. He hesitated a moment before turning the key, not sure if it was the rain or tears that moistened his face.

Flipping on the light he saw something glistening on the kitchen table.  Feeling a sudden wave of vertigo he grabbed the doorframe to steady himself.   There on the kitchen table sat a gold frame holding a picture of him and Jill taken the night he proposed.  Rex picked it up looking at the image of the happy couple gazing at each other with eyes silently speaking love. He clutched the picture to his chest and wept.  He was puzzled at how the picture appeared on the kitchen table - and why?

The next night, still insisting on blocking happiness from his life, he was hit with another surprise.  Small pink roses sat on the kitchen table – the kind that made up Jill’s wedding bouquet.  Rex sat down at the table picking up the bouquet breathing in the delicate scent.  He caressed the soft fresh flowers thinking of their wedding day, picturing how beautiful Jill was and how happy they had been.  Again he sat weeping, blaming himself for her death and wondering how and why the flowers appeared.

Rex hurried home from work the next night to see what surprise awaited him.  On the kitchen table sat an opened cookbook.  He picked it up, “BBQ Meat Balls” he chuckled as he fingered the pages stained with BBQ sauce.  The first meal she made after they had gotten married. He laughed thinking of that night, picturing Jill and the kitchen splattered with the sauce.  He remembered how he wiped her cheek and kissed her sauce-splattered nose.  These memories were replacing the pain-filled places in his heart with joy.  But again he resisted the warmth of memories. Instead he embraced pain and regret as the sentinel to keep happiness from entering his devastated heart.

Nothing showed up for several weeks, until one night something sparkled brightly on the table.  Rex could not believe what he saw; there it was Jill’s wedding ring.   Hoping to ease his pain he had buried the ring with her. To keep it, he thought, would cause too much grief. Now all this was too much for him to handle.  Who was playing this trick on him? How were these items appearing? 

Later that night Rex was awaken by a dazzling light cascading over the bedroom walls.  There in the light blue radiance, looking beautiful like a princess stood Jill.  She reached her arms out toward him and in a soft voice said, “Rex don’t be tortured by my death.  Death is just another step in our existence.  I did not leave you. I only died and moved from this life to experience the beauty of the next.   One day we will be together again.  Be happy. Don’t waste life with regrets and sadness. Fill you heart with happiness and memories of the love we shared.  I left those memories for you, to remind you our time together was precious.  Keep the memories close. Remember me but enjoy and live the life you have now.”  She then blew him a kiss and disappeared. 

Rex sat in the dark room feeling a loving warmth embrace him.  He would hold these loving memories his wife gave him in his heart for all time. 

Friday, January 10, 2014

Observing the Coffee Shop People... And a Little Love and Passion - Entry 4

 Image courtesy of Sura Nualpradid /FreeDigitalPhotos.net
This started as a writing exercise as I sat at the coffee shop observing people for character development.

Reading over it one day I  decided to write a short story based on the characters.  I kept it in the form of a journal.

January 10….
Starting again.  Trying to get the creative feelings going for the New Year.  Writing every day…haha…a joke I think.  Am I looking for something or not? 

Seems to be baby day at the café.  A couple with a grandbaby, they are much older people than me.  There are also two men with two children.  A cute little toddler girl and an infant in the seat still with a snowsuit on, I can’t tell if the infant is a boy or girl.  I think they are a gay couple, just seem like they are partners and not baby sitting for their wives.  They are in early 40’s, African- American.   The one man knows how to take care of the children very well; the other man was looking at cookbooks.  The kids are so cute, they seem happy, the whole family seems happy.  The little girl is waving at me. I don’t think she knows I’m white or that I’m fifty-six or that I still have such lustful sensual thoughts and feelings, at my age.  No one knows that, shouldn’t that be gone when silver moves into the hair and retirement come?  Maybe I’m odd.  I wave back at the little girl.

Look at them, such a happy family the kids are so cute you can see they are so loved.  Some would criticize this family consisting of two dads thinking it so awful for the kids.  I don’t know, isn’t love just love.  Those kids could have “mommy & daddy” and just exist with no love, only hate, misery and abuse given to them.  And the two men, they seem so content with each other.  A partner to go through life with to share the pain and the love, having someone to share life with sounds so ideal.   Make note:  need a life partner.

I am drinking a Chi Tea Latté; the old man at the counter does not know how to make it very well.  Aretha Franklin is not here, wasn’t here before Christmas either. I wonder if she was the one who fell. I heard that someone fell.  I hope not. I miss Aretha, she likes my hair, and I need people to remind me I still am good.

The Grandma must be a great-grandma.  She is having fun with the baby.  She has no worries, raised her kids now she is having a great time with the baby. Two different generations, two that can get along and are sometimes forgotten and they both can learn so much from each other.  Society needs to respect elderly people they have much love to give to children. Will I ever be a grandma?  I’m old enough, oh but my mind is twenty-six and I still have lustful sensual thoughts and feelings. Grandmas can’t have those. Can they?  ....

© Copyright 2014   Eileen A Partak

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Observing the Coffee Shop People... And a Little Love and Passion - Entry 2

Image courtesy of Sura Nualpradid /FreeDigitalPhotos.net
This started as a writing exercise as I sat at the coffee shop observing people for character development.

Reading over it one day I  decided to write a short story based on the characters.  I kept it in the form of a journal.

November 5….

Haven’t written or studied writing for a week.   The process does make me think young.   It does put me in an emotional slump if I don’t write…so write! 

Make room for writing. Make room for studying how to write and make room for research.  Bought study books and some sort of writing software today.  What am I looking for now, a new career as a writer or a new hobby?  Looking for something, maybe answers.  All these years of working all these years of living, there must be some answer to something I want to know.  But what do I want to know?

Who will be my character study today?  There, the Coffee Shop Couple –
They are young, but been together for a while, probably were high school sweethearts before marrying.  He is very good looking and in good shape.  She seems to have been pretty once, maybe the “Prom Queen”. Years have put pounds on her, so many she is on her way to being handicapped, has trouble walking. 

They sit and read, they must make the coffee shop/book store a regular habit.  I should talk I think I’m a regular now.  They comment on their reading but are pretty much in their own “cell”.  Him especially.  She makes comments he faintly listens, but he still loves her, kisses her when she needs his help getting off the chair. But he is missing something, he lives comfortable but needs a more charged emotional, physical life, it shows on his face and in his eyes. 

How does it happen?  How does love move into such drudgery?   Shouldn’t we always care, shouldn’t we always try.  What makes passion and desire take a nap with the one we thought would keep it alive?  Do we live too long?  Make too many personality changes so we out grow people, move on from what we felt and thought was our life dream.  Do our social rules stop us from letting our human side live as it was meant to live?

Make note: examine humans, their daily social routine and desires, both controlled and non-controlled.  Get more coffee...



© Copyright 2013   Eileen A Partak

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Captured Fire - Part 9

Image courtesy of suphakit73 /FreeDigitalPhotos.net
This is the Ninth
installment of the 
short story 
Captured Fire

This story is the story of a nine-year-old boy,
Robbie, who enters a magical world where he learns about the meaning of life,
friendship, and respect for others

***
After what seemed an eternity the neighborhood quieted down, only for the voice of a few mothers calling their sons to come in.  The trio flew down to the yard to view the aftermath.  Several jars were scattered in the yard blinking like hazard lights.  They landed next to one that was on its side with the lid off.  Robbie immediately ran into the jar.

“How is everyone, do you need medical help?” he surveyed the interior of the glass prison seeing most were well except for a few bulb amputees. Convinced that things were under control he ran off to the next jar that was standing up right in the yard, Rosella and Jason were already there.  As he approached he saw Jason’s face contorted in a look combined with fear and confusion.  Rosella seemed to be explaining something to him.

“As you can see, without air they can’t breathe, without breath there is no life.”

Robbie saw as he got closer the lid was on the jar and everyone inside was gasping for air.  The hurt and mutilated were lying at one side of the jar.  He had to think fast to try to save them.  There were three of them.  Maybe they could help everyone get out, he thought as he surveyed the jar.

“I’ve got an idea.  The three of us can push the jar and I believe we have enough strength to knock it down.  I got out of the bughouse by myself, I think the three of us can generate enough energy to open that lid.” He ran to the side of the jar and motioned for the others to follow him. Rosella hurried to help while Jason just stood staring at the jar.

“Fairy, why don’t you just use your magic and open the lid? Fix everyone.  Look what you did to me, just go ahead and do this. Help them.”  Jason tried to sound strong but his voice had a quiver to it, maybe even a pleading tone.

Rosella stopped and looked at him shaking her head.  “You just don’t understand do you?  Some things cannot be fixed with magic it takes much more caring and compassion. 
My kind of magic has it limits. Now the heart and love must do the work.”  Then she left him standing and accompanied Robbie in trying to down the jar.

“I think if we put our strength at the very bottom, push with all we have it will probably fall down.” Robbie said with assurance. “Then we can push on the lid and I know we can get it opened.”

Rosella agreed and both squatted down and pushed their hands under the bottom of the jar as far as they could.  On the count of three they both pushed with all their might. The tendons on their necks bulged and their faces turned deep red.  Out of breath they both stopped. Repositioning they tried one more time, this time the jar moved on the ground just a little.  Stopping to catch their breath again Robbie looked inside and saw the fireflies gasping for air but trying to look hopeful for rescue.

“I think we’ve got it now, we know what to do.  It did moved a little.  Just a little harder and we will have it.”  Robbie’s voice was starting to lose the confidence he had started with, but he got down again ready to try one more time.

“One. Two. Three. P U S H.”  They both grunted and strained pushing as hard as they could. The jar teetered just a little and those inside who could move tried to help by running to the other side and jumped up and down. Rosella and Robbie used all their muscle and faith in believing it their responsibility to knock the jar down. 

Robbie was just about to the end of his hope and ready to stop when they both heard a loud screeching and thumping behind them and before they could turn around to see, they were hit from behind with a huge force.  Something went sliding between them and down under the jar in a flash, it was Jason.  In an instant the jar started to rock back and forth in slow motion. As it leaned over farther the fireflies inside all ran up the angle and before anyone could blink an eye, it crashed to the ground. To the small creatures inside it fell with the force of an earthquake.

Panting and exhausted the three were motionless on the ground for a few seconds.  Then Jason stood up, “come on we have to get that lid off,” and he ran off quickly. Rosella and Robbie gave each other a surprised look then got up and joined Jason at the cap of the jar. 

“Okay we have to have a plan, I know we can do this if we all work together.  Look we got it this far.  I got out of the bughouse so with combined energy we can do this.”  The two watched Robbie as his mind worked to calculated how to unscrew the cap with the same concentration he used to calculate catching fireflies.  After all unscrewing a cap is much different when you are a beetle than it is when you are a human boy.

“Okay, if we use the force on this side to push up and force on the other side to push down we should get it opened. Jason you stay here and be the push up guy. I’ll fly to the other side I’ll pull down. Rosella you get on the top and watch how it moves and push up or down as needed.”

They all got to their positions hoping Robbie knew what he was talking about.
The fireflies in the jar looked with anticipation, also praying, that he did.  Robbie landed on the jar ring about midway from the ground and planted his feet as firmly as he could on the slippery glass. Rubbing his hands together he then placed them on the jar ring.  Jason at the same time positioned himself under the ring and dug his little feet into the ground as deeply as he could, placing his hands and his shoulders on the cold metal ring, ready to use all his strength to push.  Rosella flew to the top of the jar ready to see which way she was to push; she had no idea what Robbie wanted her to do.

The jar was quickly losing what little air it had and Robbie knew there was not much time left to get his friends out alive.  He closed his eyes tight, said a little prayer, and yelled. “Now push!”  Jason raised his arms like a weightlifter and Robbie braced himself and started pulling the ring. Rosella saw the best place for her to push was just a little past the middle of the jar.  Adrenaline kicked in for all three and none of them seemed to slow down.  One, two, three times they tried.  “We have to do it this time, or I think we lose,” Robbie yelled to them. All three nodded for they knew he was right, with a deep breath, and a pray, all pushed harder then they ever thought possible.  Finally a little slip of the ring, their little arms shaking and straining, the ring slid and the top popped off.  Robbie lay on the ground dizzy and out of breath as Rosella flew over to him. “Robbie, we did it we actually did it.  For years we have never been able to understand the mechanics of these prisons, we needed you to show us,”  she then flew over to the opening and started to help those who were injured.  Robbie stood up and Jason walked over to him just as the medic crew flew in to take the injured back to the firefly village.

Jason just looked at Robbie dumbfounded, “Wow,” he said.  “I never would have believed any of this.” 

“Me either,” Robbie answered.

§

© Copyright 2013   Eileen A Partak

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Captured Fire - Part 7

Image courtesy of suphakit73 /FreeDigitalPhotos.net
This is the Seventh
installment of the 
short story 
Captured Fire

This story is the story of a nine-year-old boy,
Robbie, who enters a magical world where he learns about the meaning of life,
friendship, and respect for others

***
The morning after the ceremony Robbie was up bright and early, a little tired from all the celebrating the day before, but ready to receive his orders.  He didn’t understand what orders meant; it must be his job or where he was going to live. He figured it must be something like that, after all what does a firefly really do.

All the new cadets met in the training room all excited anticipating the start to their new life as mature fireflies.  As he sat waiting for the captain of assignments to arrive he noticed a large map on the wall.  He strained his eyes to see it and noticed it was a map of his neighborhood, his neighborhood as a boy.  Through the door the captain of assignments walked in carrying a clipboard. 

“Today is first assignment day,” he said as he surveyed the eager group. “Each of you will be given an area to work. Today you will observe those with experience.  When I call your name you will go with your group leader.”  He then started to read off names.

“These individuals are assigned to Poplar Street, Cagewire, Runter…” each firefly stood in line and then was escorted out with their leader.

“These individuals are assigned to Mayberry Street.”

Robbie’s eyes opened wide, Mayberry Street, he was astonished thinking that is where he lived.

“Schrewer, Martworth, Robbie…”

Robbie stood up quickly and took his place in line.  ‘I am going home,’ he thought.  Then his thoughts stopped.  ‘How can I go home? I’m not a boy anymore but a firefly. This is my home now.’

Robbie followed the others out of the room and down the hall into the dining room where a huge meal was waiting.  They all ate the breakfast in silence either because of excitement or nervousness, but not a word was spoken.  After they were finished eating they were introduced to the rest of their squad.  These were mature fireflies who were huge and muscular next to the little cadets.  Some of the fireflies had rips in their wings or antenna missing, but it didn’t seem to matter to them. They all strutted around the room with immense confidence.   The cadets looked at them with envy hoping to one day be just like them.

The cadets were then paired off in twos to a big firefly who would be their work trainer. Robbie and his group were assigned to a big scary fly that had a missing eye, two ripped wings and only one antenna.  They approached him, trying not to show too much of the fear they felt.  As they stood in front of him, he gave them a warm friendly smile and said ‘hi.’

Robbie was glad to be with Martworth, they had gone through training side by side.  Martworth was one of the smallest fireflies and rather shy, but he was one of the friendliest and most determined to succeed in what he did.  Most of the others teased him, but Robbie liked him very much for he knew what it was like to be teased by others.  He was always being teased about his upturned nose, and the fact that he was smaller then most of the boys his age.

Their work trainer led them down a dark hallway that inclined upwards towards a light at the end.  He told them his name was Barra. He was the most experienced night worker. When they reached the light he motioned for them to go ahead.   They walked toward the lighted archway and found themselves in the land above. It was daylight and their eyes were not accustomed to such brightness. They squinted to see the land before them.

Barra took their hands and helped walk them over to the shade under the huge old oak tree where the rest of the squad was waiting.  Robbie and Martworth sat down with the other new cadets.  Attention focused on their trainers.  Barra was the leader of this squad and he addressed the group.

“We want to welcome all the new members to Meltor Squad.  Today we will start your orientation, you will get to know all members of Meltor.”  Barra motioned toward the squad and they nodded in acknowledgement to the new members. “You must get to know each member and work closely with them, your life and theirs can depend on this knowledge and cooperation.”

All the new members spent the day out in the sun hearing stories of bravery from the old members of the Meltor squad.  They learned each squad was assigned an area and they must learn to know that area completely.  Each squad was named after a legendary hero of the past. Meltor, they learned was one of the greatest heroes surviving the most attacks ever in the history of the firefly kingdom. The area Meltor Squad was assigned to was the most treacherous since the most dangerous Land-one lived there.

The day ended with a flying race between the new and old members and a huge banquet.  Robbie could not remember when he had enjoyed himself so much.  As night fell the new members were told to go home. Tonight they would not go out, but they were to rest for tomorrow night, which would be their first work assignment.

They all retreated to their dorm rooms. Martworth was now Robbie’s roommate and the two settled in for the evening.  Martworth told Robbie about his family. He had fifty siblings and they all had been very close as infants.

“Me and my brothers were all sent off to training as soon as we evolved into beetles and my sisters were sent to reproduction training.  I am especially proud of my sisters they are important breeders because our father was a hero. ”

His father had been a member of the Meltor Squad but was killed at work one night.  “I never really knew my father I was just a larva when he died, but I have heard many wonderful things about him. I do want to be brave like he was,” Martworth said as his eyes filled with tears.

Robbie envied the fact that Martworth had brothers and sisters, being an only child had been very lonely for him.  He also wondered about the dangerous Land-one who lived in his boy-life neighborhood. He probably knew this person and therefore knew the killer of Martworth’s father.  This made him sad and he did not want to think about it.

The two friends talked and laughed late into the night until kings’ guards came to tell them lights out.  It was difficult to fall asleep that night with the thoughts of their new assignment the following evening. Eventually the both were lost in their dreams. Martworth dreaming of being a famous hero like his father. Robbie struggled to sleep, unsure of his future, would he ever be a boy again or a firefly forever. Finally his dreams mellowed, dreaming he was at home with Nana and she was young again.

Next morning they met in the squad room and were given instructions for the evening run.  Most were assigned to light show duty as was the common job for young fireflies who where to young for dating and marriage. When they were mature enough they would be taught the mating signals, which at this point all the young squad members thought was a rather “icky” thing, but in reality an important job to keep the community alive.  Other members of the squad were assigned to food gathering for the elderly and injured members of the kingdom who could not fly and get out anymore.

Robbie and Martworth were both assigned to the same light show group so they had flashing classes all day.  The routine was easy and fun and everyone in the group was very excited to get out that evening and perform.  They were cautioned not all humans enjoyed the light show and to be very aware of the surroundings and the dangers of being caught.

At pre-dusk the squad assembled at the base of the oak tree.  The old members got their assignments and many snickered at the young new members who could hardly contain themselves with their excitement.  Attendance was taken and they all stood in groups according to their night’s assignment. Soon they flew off to Mayberry Street for an evening of work.

When they reached Mayberry Street each group followed a leader to an assigned area.  Robbie couldn’t believe it he was assigned to the area that encompassed his and Jason’s yard, he would probably see all his old friends.

Robbie was amazed.  Here he was a firefly flying around his own neighborhood.  High in the sky he surveyed the land below.  He never knew Mayberry Street was so huge. Everyone in his group started performing the practiced routine, and they looked magnificent.  About half way through the performance he saw the neighborhood boys rushing after him and Martworth.  He flew - whoosh - to the other side of the yard.  The boys, recovering from their stumble, raced over to where he hovered with his light blinking.  He then presented a sarcastic blink to them.  Again they tried to capture him and missed. He flew as fast as he could to the yard two doors down.  He sat proud on a leaf of a hazelnut tree.  ‘Not only am I the best firefly catcher on Mayberry Street, but the fastest and best firefly.’ He had no idea it could be so much fun being a bug.  ‘No one can catch Robbie the Great Firefly Extraordinaire.’

Robbie sat glowing in self-importance when in an instant darkness covered his world.  He felt moist warmth crushing him, an earthy aroma infiltrating his nostrils. Next thing he knew, he was plummeting through a clear wide tunnel.   He braced himself to hit hard.  But he came to stop with a thump on what seemed to be a soft cushion.  Robbie shook his head and waited a moment while his vision cleared.  It wasn’t a cushion.  On the floor piled one upon each other were fellow fireflies.  Some looked dazed while others were missing wings and lights, while all seemed to be gasping for breath.  Those not injured where in a frenzied mode trying to help those in need. 

He could see the clear tunnel he came down was a giant canning jar, the kind Nana used to can tomatoes, and the kind he had used to catch fireflies.  Through the glass walls of the jar the outside world was a distorted scene of colors.  Movement could be seen, but it was difficult to interpret what action was taking place in the outside world, and by whom.   A loud bang was heard up above and everyone in the glass prison let out a cry.  Robbie looked around at his fellow fireflies and saw terror on their faces as they ran in panic.  An older firefly with a calmer look about him bumped into Robbie, he evidently had experienced this horror before.

“What is happening?” Robbie cried out.  

“It’s those that captured us. They have closed off the prison. There are no air ducts in the roof,” the old firefly said has he turned to attend to a younger comrade who had no wings and was taking his last breathes of life. 

Robbie looked up and saw the cap to the jar.   There it was a solid surface with no means to let air in the jar.  This was the important reason he had received the ‘bughouse’ for a gift, it gave the fireflies plenty of air so they could breathe and not suffocate.  He never before understood the importance of this, but now he did.

Those with no injuries, or minor ones, helped separate the injured from the dead.  With tears in his eyes Robbie helped as best he could, it was not easy seeing friends he lived with and attended class with hurt or dying.  It was also getting difficult for him to breathe, but he moved along with the rest to help those who needed him.

The lid to the jar opened up again and a blast of air covered them as everyone who could, began breathing in as much air as possible.  Then suddenly the container fell to the ground with a huge jolt.  Robbie slowly stood up in a daze and saw the jar was lying on its side in the yard with the lid off.  Everyone who could move started toward the opening.  He looked down the long jar and out across the yard and saw the boys running off.  He did remember those nights with them catching fireflies. Little did he know how much harm and damage he caused.

“Help me get the injured out of the prison,” the old fly interrupted Robbie’s thoughts.  He quickly came back to the present remembering now he was a firefly now and the boys were the enemy.

All who could, helped move the injured out of the jar-prison and laid them on the cool grass.  Martworth flew back to the kingdom to get help to carry the injured back for medical care.  The old fly gave orders how to bandage broken limbs and stop bleeding, others went back into the jar and pulled out the dead and prepared them for burial as the Chaplin said a pray over the torn bodies.

Panic and discipline at the same time filled the air around the glass prison.  Most of the young fireflies cried in terror not knowing where to run.  The mature took charge comforting the scared and attending the injured.


Martworth returned with the medical group and soon all the injured were taken back to the hospital for emergency care.  The dead were left where they succumbed as the survivors said a silent pray themselves before returning home.

“So now you see what your kind has done to our citizens.  For what reason? Because we can do something they cannot?  We light up the sky at night with a beautiful show giving beauty to the world of humans, and what do we get, death and mutilation.” 

A huge teardrop ran down his cheek and sorrow showed in his eyes as he looked up at the King, “I never knew what I was doing. I never thought of the fireflies as living beings.  Nana tried to tell me. She gave me the bughouse for collecting, but still I never really knew.”  He then let out a loud howl and was unable to stop crying.

§

© Copyright 2013   Eileen A Partak

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Meadow Painting

Image courtesy of franky242  /FreeDigitalPhotos.net  

The picture I painted. It is perfect. It is vibrant and cheerful. I move into it to watch and live the scene.

A little girl, with soft, bouncy, brown curls, runs in the meadow picking brightly colored wildflowers. Not a care in the world as she takes the child size bouquet to her mother who sits under the shade of the oak tree.

They have lemonade, and butter cookies, and laugh together, and smile at each other with love, as each conveys a story. They watch the butterflies move vigorously from one beautiful flower to the next, consuming the luscious sweet nectar. Mother closes her eyes. She listens to the sweet music of Daughter's laughter as she plays with a kitten in the tall, soft, grass. The warm yellow sun embraces them all.

A warm breeze blows over Mother’s face and revives her from her trance.  She rises from the lawn chair and slowly places the white straw hat on her head.  She moves across the meadow. The wind is stronger now. Her pale yellow dress is blown out behind her, floating above the ground. Daughter cries out, Mama please don't leave me, but Mother continues on, not listening to Daughter’s cries. She ignores her and continues walking.

Daughter runs after Mother. The wind is too strong for her little body to move, she is tossed to the ground. She continues to cry out, until Mother’s form fades from her sight, forever. 

Wind picks up, sun disappears, and a sheet of rain erupts from a broken dam embedded in dark boiling clouds. Meadow and Daughter are drenched…

The colors of my painting start to run together. They blend into bleak chaos. My painting, not of oil, but watercolor, is washed away.


Wednesday, November 7, 2012

House For Sale


Glowing sign erases the past
Bright flowers will smile in the sun
The house looks cheerful today
Someone can start with it new

Keeping the things that are yours
Destroying the things that are not
Keep them away from the owner
Her memories now in the dark



Ó 2012 Eileen A Partak

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Relief


Darkness in the shed
small and crowded
with me alone
                               my private place for relief




Ó 2012 Eileen A Partak

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Today’s Walk

Image courtesy of Tom Curtis /FreeDigitalPhotos.net            

This is the road I am on today 

Enjoy the scenery while walking here

What is around the corner

Will be there when I walk tomorrow



Ó 2012 Eileen A Partak

Monday, October 3, 2011

Allowed to Mourn – May I?

Do we have the right to mourn?
is this a given in our life path
those we love pass
automatically we march
in funeral ceremonies
accepting hugs and sympathy

Then it is over
we go to the business of
dismantling a person’s life
items so important to their heart
to us only junk

We are to go on with our life
remember good moments
moments that made us smile
moments that molded us into us
moments to connect with the one we bid farewell

But what if that process was denied
do we have the right to mourn?

Ó 2011 Eileen A Partak

Monday, August 8, 2011

Hell Days

I was in hell yesterday 
world spinning out of control
head in a vice
stomache an acrobate

Today I am several levels out of Hell
my hands grasping the spin
vice knows no power
acrobate takes a break

Life is too short
not always our’s to control

                        So today…
                                 popcorn for lunch!!




Ó 2011 Eileen A Partak