A short story about conquering a fear and learning to swim viewed through the eyes of a nine year old -
Splash!!! -- The chlorine scented water sprayed on Nan. She
shivered with cold and fear as she stood in line. The spectator’s applause echoed throughout the room. Each person swam across the length of the
pool in an energetic display of confidence and graceful strokes. Nan watched as the line of wet bathing suit
clad fourth graders meandered around the large ocean size swimming pool.
Nan was scared to go into the water. She thought back of how
she ended up in this predicament -
*****
Neither of her parents could swim. They were both scared of
the water. When Mother was a child she went to the neighborhood quarry with the
other children to play in the water. One day she bravely tried to go under
water, not knowing she was in a deep section.
A strong current pulled her down deep. Her bathing suit got hung up on
some old digging equipment that was left to disintegrate at the bottom of the
quarry. She struggled desperately to get loose. Her short life passed before
her, finally rising to the top, she swore never to go into water again.
Dad on the other hand, being a man, tried to made light of
his fear. He would not go to his swim
lessons as a child because, for now reason he could think of, he was very
frightened of the water. His parents
never knew he was not going to the lessons.
He was scared to tell his father he was scared to go. So to hide the
fact from his parents, before heading home he would use the hose in the
neighbor’s backyard to get his swim trunks and towel wet. Later in life the
strange thing was that he was in the Coast Guard, on a ship, and didn’t know
how to swim. At enlistment when asked
if he took his swim test he answered ‘yes.’
He knew if he told the truth he would have to take the test and that was
something he was too frightened to do.
When Nan’s parents saw that the local YMCA was offering five
free swim lessons to grade school students, and because of their inability to
tame the waters, it was decided Nan was to take the swim lessons. Most certainly
you could learn enough in five lessons to save yourself from drowning they
thought. Thus she would be able to save herself in the event she was thrown
into the briny depths.
Nan was also scared of the water. Up to this point in life
the only water, besides the bathtub water, she was ever in was the backyard
wading pools. There she was brave with water only ankle deep. She also didn’t
want to go alone to the lessons. She was very shy and didn’t have many friends,
but even if she did most children she knew her age already knew how to
swim.
The first day Mother took her downtown on the city bus. Mother didn’t drive so public transportation
was their means of transportation when Dad was at work. Getting off the bus they walked down the
sidewalk along the busy downtown street. It was a beautiful clear June
day. The sky was robin’s egg blue.
There was a slight breeze that gave the promise of summer. Most nine year olds would feel free as a
fledgling just out of the nest with summer vacation at hand. Not Nan.
As they got closer to the YMCA she had a lump in the pit of
her stomach, she might as well have been walking to the guillotine. When they
finally reached their destination Mother opened the door for Nan to go in. Nan hesitated a moment, the double doors
looked like the mouth of a giant whale that would swallow her as she moved
towards it. The overpowering scent of
chorine hit them as they walked in the building, making their eyes burn. They
approached the clerk at the desk, to ask directions to the locker room. The clerk, a young high school girl working
for the summer, pointed down the hall and returned her concentration to the
magazine she was reading. Nan thought
the girl didn’t want to be here any more the she did, at least the she was getting
paid and staying dry.
Nan followed mother down the long hall as she dragged her
red, white and blue striped bag behind her.
They reached the door with the big black letters painted on it that
read, WOMEN’S LOCKER ROOM – SWIMMERS ONLY !!
A fierce looking large woman with gray rooted mousy brown
hair stood at the door. Nan thought she looked like the warden of a
prison. She wore a black bathing suit.
A silver whistle hung around her neck on a red and white lanyard. She was holding a clipboard with a list of
names written down the paper.
“Swimmers name,” the woman shouted in a loud rough voice.
“Nan Franklin,” answered mother.
“Into this room Nan.
Parents not allowed in here.
Lessons will be over in an hour. Pick her up then,” The Warden said. She pushed Nan through the door and yelled
for the name of the next swimmer.
Shaking, Nan looked back and saw Mother just standing at the
door with a surprised look on her face.
Another smaller woman with a friendly face directed Nan to the next room. The room was large with concrete block walls
painted a dirty off white color. There
were long benches down the middle of each row with cream-colored lockers on
each side. There was a group of nine
small lockers stacked on top of each other in three’s with a long locker next
to each group.
Nan stood staring at the wall of lockers in front of her as
girls all around were chattering to each other. The Warden walked around the corner and blew her whistle in a
long loud ear-piercing shriek. The
chatter stopped instantly as the girls all turned to look at her.
“The long locker is where you will put your street
clothes. Strip naked, do not put on
your suit. Go back around the corner to
your left into the shower room. Every
girl must shower and wash off their suit before putting it on. Don’t forget to put on your bathing cap. All
hair must be tucked inside the cap, we don’t want hair clogging up the pool
filter.” The Warden’s orders echoed
off the concrete walls as the girls slowly started to get undressed.
Nan opened her bag and took out her swimsuit, towel, and cap
and laid them on the bench. She
hesitated for a moment before she started to unbutton her blouse. Getting undressed in a room full of other
girls never crossed her mind. She just assumed she would be getting dressed in
a private area. This embarrassed her
since she never undressed in front of strangers.
Once she took her clothes off she stuffed them quickly in
her bag and shoved them in the long locker and closed the door with a loud
bang. Nan picked up her suit, towel,
and cap. Holding them close to her naked body she slowly walked toward the
shower room.
Outside the door to the shower was the friendly face
woman. Friendly Face directed each girl
to a wall with hooks on it. This is
where they were to hang their towels while they were in the pool. Nan quickly hung her towel on the first hook
she saw. Now with less to cover her
body she clung tightly to her suit and walked into the room with the
showers.
It was a long narrow room with a row of showerheads on both
sides. The showerheads were placed high
on the wall in order to accommodate adults who also used the pool. The water beat down like little nails
penetrating her skin. She tried to look
around but between the steam in the room from the hot water and the water
pelting her from up high she could not see.
The Warden came to the door, her booming voice yelling for
everyone to grab the soap and lather up and bathe themselves, and their suit,
and rinse off well. Of course there was
to be no soapsuds in the pool along with hair to clog the filter.
After all the girls finished rinsing the soap off, they were
led into the next room to dress into their wet suits. Trying to put a wet bathing suit on a wet body is not an easy
task for anyone, let alone children.
Nan put her legs into the wet suit and slowly started to pull it up over
her long thin wet legs. The wet cloth
was going nowhere, just sticking to her body.
Nan pulled and did a little jump hopeful she could jump through the suit
to get it pulled up. All the girls in
the room seemed to be doing this same little dance as they tried to get
dressed. Next Nan tried stuffing her
wet hair into the white rubber cap. Her wet hair pulled at the scalp and hurt
as she tried to get it under the cap.
Nan was small for her age, but had very long legs and
arms. Her long stick legs protruded
from her second-hand stretchy pink bathing suit. She thought she looked like a
flamingo. Mother always said her legs
looked like they would break in half with each step she took. She was very shy and didn’t like to draw
attention to herself. The bathing suit made her very self-conscious. Her short
wavy dark brown hair was tucked into the tight white bathing cap, except for a
few tight curls surrounding her dark brown eyes. The top of her bathing cap was embossed with smiling clown faces
that seemed to be laughing hysterically at her embarrassing situation. Even
though she was only nine she felt this cap was too childish an item to be wearing
in public. She observed the other girls wearing colorful caps with little petal
shapes covering their heads like beautiful flowers. With her white-capped head sitting on top of her long thin neck
she felt like a cotton swab.
The girls were then led in a single file to the room with
the pool, pulling at their wet suits as they hike up their bodies with each
step they took.
Again the strong smell of chlorine hitting her face, only so
strong now it almost choked Nan. Once she caught her breath Nan looked in awe
at the huge room. The pool seemed to
be miles long and almost as wide; it was as large as a football field. The sun shown through the clerestory
windows and danced down to the water like a brilliant string of diamonds and
illuminated the water like clear glass.
The concrete block walls were painted shades of blue in a design that
looked like waves.
There were diving boards at the far end of the pool, one
very close to the surface of the water and the second had a ladder that reached
half way to heaven. Against one wall
there were rows of bleachers with a windowed press box in the middle.
Nan’s jaw dropped as she took in this incredible view. To her the only swimming pools she knew of
were the little blow up round rubber wading pools that the neighborhood mothers
filled up with the garden hose in the back yard.
A door slammed, the boys were coming to the pool from the
men’s locker room on the other side of the pool. They looked as wet, shivering, and scared as the girls did.
A group of six teenaged boys and girls stood near the middle
of the pool. These must be the swim
teachers Nan thought. They seemed to be
too busy with teenaged flirting to notice the group of wet youngsters standing
wide-eyed waiting to absorb the skills of swimming.
The Warden blew her shrill whistle again. The instructors, and the wet
Goose-skinned students all stood at attention as the Warden
paced up and down the side of the pool. She looked at each person with an
intense stare as she walked past.
“Boys, girls, everyone in one long line and count off to six
and we will form lesson groups,” the Warden order them.
One, two, three four….. Nan listened as the group of wet
youngster shouted out numbers. “Five,”
Nan said in a low shy voice.
The Warden told the instructors to line up and had them also
shout out a number from one to six.
“Line up behind the instructor that has your number.”
Nan looked at the line of hormone oozing teenagers for the
person who was number five. She was
hoping the girl she saw when she first came in, the short rather plump pimpled
faced girl with the friendly smile was number five. No, she was number three.
The tall girl with the piercing blue eyes and the figure that looked
like an old time sexy movie star was number five. She wore a black tank suit with a lifesaver badge at the leg and
a tight white cap with long blonde strands of hair hanging out the sides.
The students slowly walked over to their instructors and
stood quietly in line. There were four students in each group. Nan looked at the three people in her
group. There were two girls and a
boy. One of the girls was a timid
African American girl who looked at the water with more fear than Nan ever felt
in her own soul. She was small like Nan
but even thinner with her big dark brown eyes filled with tears. The other girl
was taller and heavier than Nan with a beautiful flowered swimsuit with a
little skirt. Her swim cap was a pretty
bright pink that made her green eyes look like the leaves on the stem of the
rose. This girl seemed to have more
confidence than Nan had ever felt.
The boy was tall for his age and looked much older than
nine, which was the age of this group.
He had blond hair that was cut in a buzz and it made him look bald. He had brilliant green eyes that paired up
with the rose girl. Nan didn’t know if they were brother and sister, but they
certainly were a matched set.
All the groups followed their instructors to a position at
the side of the pool. Once the instructors entered the water their authority
over the group of nine year olds grew, and unfortunately some heads grew larger
than they should have. The Warden left the room so the instructors were in
total control.
“Ok you kids, jump in the water,” ordered the Sexy Movie
Star to Nan’s group. Nan’s group
entered the water, two scared little bodies along with two confident souls.
Nan and Timid Girl lowered themselves into the water very
slowly from a sitting position at the side.
First they put their toes in, and then lowered their legs as if the
water were an acid that would eat away their skin. Nan felt the floor of the pool and let go of the side. The water was half way up her chest and she
felt as if the pressure of the water would crush every organ in her body.
The confident Matched Set both jumped in with a terrific
splash and stood laughing together in the waist high water with both pairs of
eyes glimmered like stars. Sexy Movie
Star turned her back on Nan and Timid Girl, and then turning to Matched Set
with a big smile. Nan felt they were saying we are the cool ones - let's forget
the scared babies.
“Ok kids who can go underwater?” Sexy Movie Star asked the
group while only looking at the Matched Set.
“Everyone pinch their noses and go under the water to the count of
ten.” The Matched Set eagerly pinched
their noses and together dropped under the water with a splash.
Nan reluctantly grabbed hold of her nose, closed her eyes,
took a very deep breath and slowly lowered her head under the water. She could feel the wall of water covering
over her face. Once the water covered
her ears she could hear the muffled underwater sounds in the pool. It seemed like whales were calling each
other and ship anchors were clanging against the bottom. She quickly started to count to ten then pushed
her head back up.
She lived! She held
her breath in the water and lived!
Maybe swimming wouldn’t be so horrible after all Nan thought.
The rest of the swim time was more covering their faces with
water and holding on to the side of the pool - extending their legs and
kicking.
Finally the Warden blew her loud whistle to indicate the end
of the hour. All the students marched
back to the locker rooms in a single file.
Back in the shower room they were told to strip and rinse
the pool water of their suits and bodies.
The water coming from the showers didn’t feel any better after
swimming. Out of the shower room
everyone grabbed their towels off the hooks outside the room. Timid girl stood crying looking at the
wall; her towel was missing. Friendly
Face came to comfort her and brought her a white scratchy pool towel and helped
her to the lockers. Nan felt sorry for
her.
Nan grabbed her towel and covered herself and quickly walked
to the locker. Once she was dressed she
followed the other girls down the hall to the lobby of the swim center. Mother was sitting on a big couch reading a
magazine.
“Well how was the lesson?” she asked.
“It was fine, I guess. Not as bad as I thought it would be.”
“Good,” Mother answered looking at her watch. “We have to
hurry now to catch the bus.”
That night Nan went to bed worrying about the next swim
lesson. “Four more lessons. I just have to survive four more times,”
shutting her eyes tight as she tried to fall asleep.
*****
A knock on her bedroom door pulled Nan from a deep
sleep.
“Nan get up you can’t sleep all day. You have to catch the
early bus to get to your swim lesson,” Mother said as she walked in the room.
“I hope you hung your suit up to dry yesterday, you don’t
want to put on a wet suit,” Mother said as she opened the blinds and let the
morning sun stream into her room.
Nan laughed to herself.
Little did Mother know it was mandatory to put on a wet suit.
She followed the scent of toast to the kitchen where Mother
had her breakfast on the table. “You
have to eat light if you’re swimming.
You don’t want to get sick in the pool,” Mother said as she poured a
glass of milk.
“I could only take you to the first lesson. You will have to
go by yourself from now on, I don’t have anyone to watch the baby.” Mother said. “Anyway you’re old enough now to go downtown by yourself. The bus
will stop at the corner at 8:30. Get the money for your fare out of the can on
the desk.”
Another item of worry for Nan, she had never taken the bus
by herself. She had no idea which bus
to take and how to tell the driver where she wanted to get off. Now the question was, what was more
terrifying, the bus or the swimming?
When she was dressed Nan went over to the coffee can covered
with flowered contact paper. This is where Dad would empty his pockets of
change every night when he came home from work. Nan had no idea what the cost of the bus ride was. She looked for Mother to ask her how much to
take, but she was feeding the baby and Nan didn’t want to bother her.
Nan plunged her hand into the can and came up with a handful
of coins. That should be enough for two
rides. Nan headed out the door to wait
for the bus with pockets weighted down with the coins.
Another beautiful clear day, but of course all Nan saw was
gloom as she waited for the second day of her pending execution.
The big green and white monster rolled up to the corner and
opened its big door. Nan looked at the
mile high steps and the huge driver sitting upon the seat. He looked down at her with sharp slits for
eyes that went through her like a knife. His body was round and tumbled over
the side of the big leather seat. A
mustache, like a broom, hung over a mouth that held teeth as big as boulders. His extra large hands, resting on the
steering wheel looked as if they could block out the sun if he held them
up. He looked like an ogre in the fairy
tales, the kind that ate little children.
Nan climbed the steps and stopped in front of the big box
that took the money. “How much is the
fare?” she asked quietly as every inch of her body shook.
“Seventy-five cents,” the Ogre shouted back.
Nan plunged her hand into her pocket and pulled out a
handful of coins. Counting as she
dropped them one by one into the fare box, “Five, ten, fifteen…” the nickels
fell to the convey belt and rode their way to the bottom of the box making a clink
as they hit their silvery resting place at the bottom.
Nan’s face turned red and sweat started to bead up on her
forehead as the Ogre started to breathe hard and fast with annoyance. How unfortunate the coins she grabbed were
all nickels and pennies.
“..Seventy-three, seventy-four, seventy- five,” she finished
paying her fare with ten nickels and twenty-five pennies.
The Ogre took one more deep hard breath as if fire would
come out of his nostrils, closed the door and started the bus down the
road. Nan walked slowly to the back of
the bus feeling that every passenger was laughing and pointing at her for being
such a stupid fool. She settled down on
the big bench seat at the back of the bus and prayed she would know where to
get off and how to let the driver know. She now thought that maybe she should
have paid closer attention to what Mother did when they took the bus. Lucky for
Nan the bus stopped at the corner she recognized from the day before. She jumped off the last step and the bus
quickly drove away leaving her in a puff of choking exhaust.
She went through the same drill as the day before. Undress, shower, put on wet suit, the Warden
blowing the whistle as they marched to the pool. Today there were fewer students than yesterday. Timid girl walked next to her looking more
scared and shivering so hard her teeth were chattering. Of course Matched Set where standing with
Sexy Movie Star, all of them talking and laughing like best friends.
Today’s lesson was floating. Naturally Nan and Timid Girl, because they weren’t learning as
quickly, were ignored and Matched Set received all the attention from Sexy
Movie Star. Wasn’t this suppose to be
lessons to learn how to swim, Nan thought.
So why were the two who were doing so well getting all the attention
from the instructor? Life isn’t what you would expect it should be Nan was
learning.
Nan tried to float but was too scared to let go of the side
of the pool. Sexy Movie Star looked her
direction, “You have to let go of the pool.
Lay back and float. Why are you
so scared? Just do it,” she yelled at Nan then turned back with the Matched
Set, they were floating like they were born in water.
At least Nan tried to float even though she was making no
progress at all. Poor Timid Girl was so
frightened of the water she just stood holding the edge shaking, tears filling
her huge dark eyes. Nan scanned the
length of the pool and saw the same scene. Those who were not scared and could
master the lessons were receiving all the attention. Others like her just stood in the water shriveling up like
prunes. What can you expect to for free
lessons.
The Warden blew the loud shrill whistle, lesson over, take
shower, get dressed, and leave.
Nan walked down the street to the bus stop, then suddenly
she thought, did she have enough money for the bus fare home? She dug into her pocket and pulled out the
coins that were left and counted them.
Nan’s face went pale, she felt a stab in her chest as she
counted the coins again and then again.
“Oh no!” Nan gasped out loud.
There were twenty pennies and five nickels - only forty-five cents and
she need seventy-five cents for the bus fare.
What was she going to do?
It was too far to walk home. How would she get on the bus?
Nan felt light-headed then cold then hot, she wanted life to
end right there.
She stood at the corner with the others waiting for the
bus. She scrutinized each person. Everyone at the bus stop looked very
confident and she was sure each of them had the correct bus fare. None had such terrible problems in life as
she.
Nan noticed the bus stop crowd was getting larger. Maybe,
she thought, she could just get lost in the crowd and the driver wouldn’t notice how much money she put in the fare
box. Oh, but what if it was the Ogre he
would be sure to notice each cent that went into the box, she would be dead.
The huge bus roared up the road and stopped with a screech
of the brakes. The crowd marched
forward up the steps. Clink, clink,
clink. The coins played their ecstatic
song as they were deposited into the box.
Nan approached the box, took a deep breath and as quick as possible let
her twenty pennies and five nickels leave her fingers. She fearfully looked up bracing herself for
the Ogre’s mighty blow. But it wasn’t
the Ogre at all but a friendly gray haired grandpa type with smiling blue eyes
and a friendly smile. He looked back, giving her a welcoming nod.
She quickly moved to the back of the bus and tried hiding
behind the tall seats hoping the Grandpa wouldn’t notice she was stealing the
ride from the bus company. All the way
home she was worried he would call on his radio and the police would be waiting
for her as she descended the bus.
Finally her stop came, she got up to leave. The Grandpa looked in the rear view mirror,
raised his hand and waved to her saying, “Have a good day sweetie.”
She stepped off the bus - no police. She took a sigh of relief and happily ran
home.
That night Nan lay in bed not being able to understand what
was going wrong with the lessons. She
was trying to learn to swim so she wouldn’t almost drown like Mother. She was not ditching her lessons like Dad
did, even though she was probably as scared of the water as he. Why was she being ignored and not being
taught how to swim? These questions
haunted her until she finally gave into tiredness and fell asleep.
*****
The morning started pretty much the same with Mother waking
her, a light breakfast, getting bus fare money. Only today Nan knew exactly how much money to take.
The Ogre was driving the bus again this morning. Nan walked with confidence up the steps,
dropped three quarters in the box and walked like a pro to the back of the
bus. She conquered the bus.
Again the swim routine, undress, shower, put on wet suit,
the Warden blowing whistle, marching to the pool. Only today the Warden’s whistle didn’t seem as shrill. Also today Timid Girl was not there. She was alone in her group with Matched
Set. Review of floating was the
beginning of the lesson. Nan could
still not master it but was starting to understand the mechanics of the whole
thing. Next, incorporating the stroke
with floating, actual swimming.
With a flirtatious look Sexy Movie Star kept glancing over
at the boy instructor next to her. He
was very tall with short black hair and blue eyes as piercing as hers. He had two small hairs just starting to
sprout from his broad chest that he seemed very proud of. He also wore the lifesaver badge on his
black swim trunks.
“You look like you have your hands full. Do you need a some
help?” He asked Sexy Movie Star in a
debonair style as he left his students and tried to strut over to her, as well
as he could in the water.
“I could use some help.
This is a lot to handle,” she answered back while overly fluttering her
eyelashes.
Nan stopped her pretend floating and watched the love scene
before her. She looked over at Mr.
Debonair’s students who stood watching the scene too. They looked to be at about the same skill level as Nan, the very
bottom.
The glamorous four laughed having a wonderful time in the
water. The Matched Set were getting
private lessons as the three lost souls stood shivering and forgotten in the
water.
*****
The last two days of lessons were pretty much the same only
with Mr. Debonair’s two Lost Souls gone.
It seemed she was getting a little more attention today, or maybe she
actually was embracing the water and letting go of her fear.
Several students were taken over to the deep end of the pool
where the diving boards were located.
These students swam back and forth the width of the pool from one
instructor to the other.
At the end of the lesson the Warden blew her whistle as
usual, but today told everyone to sit down at the edge of the pool for an
announcement.
“Today was the last of your swim lessons. I hope everyone has learned the basics of
swimming. Tomorrow night at 7 p.m. a demonstration will be held for your
parents and any other family members you want to bring so you can show off the
skills you have learned,” she said in her booming voice. “We will see everyone
here tomorrow night. I hope you had a wonderful time learning to swim.” Ending her speech she blew her whistle one last
shrill time as everyone marched off to the locker rooms.
When Nan got home she hesitantly handed mother the notice
regarding the swimming demonstration.
“How wonderful.”
Mother seemed to be beaming with pride as she tacked the notice up on
the kitchen corkboard.
***
The night Nan was dreading was upon her - the swimming
demonstration.
Mother made a hearty supper of pasta and meatballs with red
sauce, but told Nan she shouldn’t eat much before swimming. How could she eat anyway, her stomach was
flip-flopping like a fish out of water.
Nan was now teetering between being scared and excited. She had no idea what the swimming
demonstration would entail, that is the part that scared her. Being so shy it was very difficult for her
to do things without knowing everything that would happen. On the other hand,
Mother and Dad would be there to watch, that excited her. Dad would be proud that she had gone to her
lessons to learn to swim. Mother would
see that the water wouldn’t swallow her up.
*****
Splash!!! -- The chlorine scented water sprayed on Nan
hitting her in the face again, she was scared of this demonstration now that
she was here. The instructors were in
the pool forming a line down the length.
First a girl would jump in the pool and swim the length with encouraging
words delivered from the instructors.
Then a boy would jump in and do the same. After each student ascended from the pool Nan heard the crowd
applauded loudly. The Matched Set boy’s family hooted and whistled for him as
he took a little bow before returning to the locker room.
Nan was next and she still was not sure what to do. She stood at the edge of the pool looking
down at the sparkling blue water. She had never been to this end of the pool.
“Jump in. What are you waiting for?” the instructors
yelled. “Jump in and swim to the other
end.”
Nan obeyed the orders and jumped in feet first, her heart
pounding with fright. She sliced
through the clear glass surface as the water covered her whole body. She heard the muffled whale cries and the
anchor sound hitting the bottom of the pool again. But then she suddenly realized the horrifying truth. She was not touching the pool floor - she continued
to descend down. She continued down,
down into the briny depths - to her death!
Nan saw her life pass before her. She recalled Mother’s near drowning story. Mother was right to never go in the water
again. She opened her eyes under the water and could see the legs of the
instructors moving as they treaded water to keep in place.
Finally, by some miracle, she rose to the surface of the
water. She was coughing, spitting water
and splashing franticly. She could hear
the voices of the instructors, but she was in such a panic she could not make
out what the words were. She heard
someone telling her to grab something, but she wasn’t sure what. Then through blurry, chorine stung eyes she
made out the figure of the Warden at the side of the pool holding a long
pole.
“Grab the pole - grab the pole.” The Warden yelled as she
pushed a long slender silver pole toward Nan.
Nan tried to grab the pole but each time she would reach for
it she would panic. Each time she
panicked she would sink into the vicious waters again. The Warden kept trying
to fish her out with the pole.
Finally she grabbed the pole and the Warden pulled her along
the remaining length of the pool. Water
sprayed in her face as she sped along the glassy top of the pool. She reached the end of the pool after what
seemed like a hundred years. Awkwardly
she pulled herself out feeling like weights were trying to take her back to the
deep wet bottom.
Nan heard no cheering, no applauds from the crowd. She ran
with tears swelling in her eyes out of the room. This time she stood under the pelting shower spray, tears mixing
with the water, while she wished to die.
Nan could not think of
a more humiliating moment in her life.
She had never been to the deep end of the pool, how was she to know
there was no bottom to stand on. How
was she to swim when no one gave her the proper instruction? She swore she would never go in the water
again the rest of her life.
Nan was so upset she didn’t say a word the whole ride
home. She wasn’t even sure if Mother
and Dad spoke. Once they got home she
ran to her room and jumped on the bed crying.
A few moments later Dad came in to see her.
“I was awful. I was the worse one.” Nan sobbed with her head
buried in the pillow. “I was the only
one they didn’t clap for.”
“Now Nan. You were not the worse.” Dad said in his kind soothing voice. “Everyone was a student there, not everyone was at the same
level. Everyone received applause, even
you because everyone tried his or her best.
Was that the first time you were in the deep end of the pool?”
Nan explained everything to Dad. About how she thought the instructors gave all the attention to
the students who weren’t scared of the water. How all the other students who
were scared were ignored because they didn’t catch on as quickly.
Dad patted her back as she continued to cry.
“It’s alright. It’s not the end of the world. Sometimes things seem bad, we all have those
moments. These are the things that help
us be who we are. Toughens us up.”
Nan was now sitting up with Dad holding her. To her it was the end of the world. She stopped crying as she rested her head on
his shoulders.
“Hold your head high Nan and go back next summer. Show them you will learn to swim. Don’t let them ignore you, make waves,” he
smiled. “You will learn much more than swimming. Face the things that scare
you. You don’t want to be like your parents and scared of water your whole
life. You have more courage than me, I couldn’t have jumped in that pool,” he
laughed.
Nan looked up at Dad’s smiling face. No matter how terrible things could be he
always made her feel good. Nan gave Dad a big hug and kissed his cheek.
“I’ll remember that, but please don’t make me go to the
demonstration next time,” she pleaded.
“You go to the lessons, and you do not have to go to the
demonstration if you don’t want,” Dad said and returned a kiss to Nan. “We are
very proud of you for trying.”
“Thanks, Dad.” She looked towards the door and saw Mother
smiling at her too. “I will try again not just to conquer the deep but to make
myself proud of me.”
*****
© Copyright 2014 Eileen A Partak